typical american

Yesterday I finished reading Gish Jen's Typical American, a witty and poignant tale of Yifeng "Ralph" Chang, a Chinese man with an unrelenting desire to succeed and conquer the "American Dream." And who, comes to a point of being so hell bent about expanding his business and maximizing his profits with meaningless self-help books and modified income receipts that he is isolated and oblivious to the falling-out of his family while being the major cause of it. What engrossed me was how much Ralph Chang resemebled my own father.

I, too identified a lot with the novel, and perhaps too much with this line...
"And to be nonwhite in this society was indeed to need education, accomplishment--some source of dignity" (200).

In my opinion, it's the most telling and powerful line that expresses the struggle of Asian Americans trying to succeed, trying to fit in, and more so, (while trying not to be), eventually being typical American.

Jen is brilliant as her read contains a mixture of irony, complexity and heartache that's so true it hurts.

to the greatest, most loving woman in the world..

momma, happy birthday!
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i'm speechless whenever it comes to describing my mom. if i had to, i'd break down in tears because i don't think i would be able to find the words to fully express my love for such a beautiful, strong and caring woman.

last week i read mitch albom's latest novel, for one more day, which i highly reccommend. it's an easy and enjoyable read, and notably, one which illustrates the power and love of mothers. it makes you realize how easily we can take life and our mother for granted, and it's not until it's too late that we wish we could go back and grasp what we once had. instead, albom's message is to not wait but to capture every moment as it comes and let it spark. great, great book!

i love you, mommy! thank you, thank you.. for everything!

a read over love and time


As I stand in the elevator, dazed, I realize that a massive winning lottery ticket chunk of my future has somehow found me here in the present, and I start to laugh.

I must have read that line at least ten times over, each time wearing a bigger smile.

My good friend, Catherine, gave me The Time Traveler's Wife as a Christmas present. A full year is nearly approaching and alas I have opened the book! Audrey Niffenegger's style and story is all so beautiful and eloquent; this book is certainly the endearing read I need. Oh, I can't bare to put it down!

Getting Started or Perhaps Getting a Head Start

I hate to admit it but I've become hooked to Myspace --I remember I had this same obsession with Xanga and then Livejournal years ago. I think it's cool when you can connect with friends far far away but it's almost pathetic when the first thing you do is log-in to see how many hits you've received for your profile-view, which I'm not claiming is exactly what I do but probably just as self-centered. I check my email, then go on myspace to see if anyone has left me a comment. It's a quick, banal and compulsive routine, and a phenomenon I can't explain. It could be that I just don't know how to surf the net or that connecting to cyberspace has caused me to lose my sense of creativity with time. Maybe that explains why my camcorder has sat in its pouch all summer and that I still have albums of pictures I'd like to scrapbook. I think I've just gotten lazy with having the luxury of my laptop to do most of my work for me--contacting people, completing homework, applying for jobs; it's all done while sitting on my gluteus and typing from the tip of my fingers. And for some sad reason it's exhausting. My eyes are too weary for me to want to read or think, and the stack of books on my nightstand only continue to pile high. Funny how I haven't lost to my passion to shop. I wish I can read as easily as I can purchase used books. Every summer, winter or any break-time for that matter, I make a goal to read a list of books but somehow I only get through a couple. I blame the fact that I'm a slow reader and have the bad habit of falling asleep while reading, it's quite daunting when I think of wanting to attend graduate school. I'm trying to remind myself to pick reads that I enjoy while reminding myself of the words I hear repeatedly-- it's the quality of the work that matters, not the quantity. Recent read includes Pledged by Alexandra Robbins who tells an engrossingly sad and complex story of sorority life by following the lives of four sorority girls. Each tale is unique and represents the utterly destructive Greek life where sororities are in conflict with other sororities, and then there's conflict within each individual sorority--"sisters" falling into peer pressure, abusing alcohol and drugs, adopting eating disorders, participating in hazing, competing and turning against each other, and it's all for the same reason--to prove who can best impress their male counterpart, their so-called "brothers," in fraternities. Well-written, thoroughly researched and an intriguing read. I'm currently reading The Rape of Nanking by historian Iris Chang (1968-2004) who portrayed a compelling account of the Japanese invasion of China. It's horrifying to read the details of innocent civilians being tortured through inhumane acts of cruelty, and what is more depressing is that our current international affairs prove we haven't learned much from history. I think soon it'll be time to indulge in something a little light-hearted and a bit more easy-read. Suggestions? Might I add, I have a guilty pleasure for novels by Nicholas Sparks.

I digress. I introduce one point which inevitably inspires another and then another. It's all really a vicious cycle, sorta like my life and evolving passions and aspiring careers. I'll be sure to save that topic for a future blog. What this one is dedicated to is the reason why I'm beginning my very own typepad. Aside from my futile past-time with the space, I like to read up on the blogs of Hugo Schwyzer, a European History and Women's Studies professor, good friend and mentor of mine. I must also credit my pal, Mike Fricano, who has witnessed me grow as a writer and person, and always encouraged me to pursue journalism while writing for L.A. Youth, a Los Angeles-based teen publication. With the fresh start of fall semester and lots to come, I feel it's time I resort to something meaningful, perhaps mind-blowing and even awe-inspiring. It's time I begin my own on-line blog. While I'm ecstatic about this all, I can't help but feel guilty that having an on-line blog will lead me to abandon my traditional black composition book, which I've kept so lively as my personal journal ironically inspired by one of Hugo's class assignments for Women in American Society. Blogger has its benefits--it'll encourage me to express my thoughts and inquiries daily especially because I'm more inclined to turn on my laptop than I am to grab and open my notebook and click on my pen. Sad but very true. Plus, I'd really like to improve my writing skills and what better way to do it than continuous writing, critical thinking, researching, editing and the like of serious typepad blogging. I've just approached my second year of college (today marked my first day of class)--I experienced so much throughout my first year that I can only imagine what awaits this coming one. Soon I'll traveling, organizing environmental campaigns, applying to transfer schools and living on my own in D.C. It's only obvious that there are going to be damn good stories to tell.

It's embarrassing to report that I've spent three long and grueling hours on this blog. That is why I would suffer if I went into journalism. But that is also the same reason why I am here--to practice and improve! And of course, savor the sweet moments. Enough said, good night.